"O"

Vegas

Ice Storm

Okay

Tomorrow

happy holidays

Memories in a cage..

the flood

fairy tales.

wading through the past..

the wistful hero..

There's something so beautiful about an aging man going for one last shot of glory. the wistful hero. i love it the scene at 4:14 ish..

late night..

rewatching "let's get lost" and can't get over how beautiful this movie is. and how perfect his voice is... seeing this, in terms of beauty, this is the definitive documentary and truly is bruce weber's love letter to chet.

Nessun Dorma.

Keep the Pace

and happiness must be what it feels like to be immortal...

November

My November Guest
by: Robert Frost

My Sorrow, when she's here with me,
Thinks these dark days of autumn rain
Are beautiful as days can be;
She loves the bare, the withered tree;
She walks the sodden pasture lane.

Her pleasure will not let me stay.
She talks and I am fain to list:
She's glad the birds are gone away,
She's glad her simple worsted grey
Is silver now with clinging mist.

The desolate, deserted trees,
The faded earth, the heavy sky,
The beauties she so truly sees,
She thinks I have no eye for these,
And vexes me for reason why.

Not yesterday I learned to know
The love of bare November days
Before the coming of the snow,
But it were vain to tell her so,
And they are better for her praise.

Ashore.

I think i may have lost you between your afternoon teardrops
umbrellas bursting open, you move into the blindspot.

i didn't say goodbye, it's better to fade away
bandaids off a wound, a midnight serenade.

memories lose their taste at an alarming speed
and once crowded tables now forever empty.

words that grow stale, hang in the air.
freedom is achieved when you stop to care.

we'll clasp our hands under the painted moon.
and we'll lie to each other they'll never be another you.

everything we built turns to ether
sand castles in the wind blown to the air.

and when the thought of you washes ashore
i will cherish your memory before it walks out the door.

a fine picture..

from jessica michibata's blog. invokes a feeling of freedom on a nice day doesn't it?

Chanel Mobile Art

i went to the chanel mobile art exhibit today in central park. it was like an adult disney land ride. you had a mp3 player that guided you through the exhibit telling you what to look at and when to move. it was quite amusing. i kept looking at my friend martha who was 3 seconds ahead of me so i could get a head start. most of the work was pretty standard fare. sex, materialism etc all tied into chanel, which i found slightly obnoxious. i really enjoyed Le Trottoir by Argentinian artist Leandro Erlich. it was so pretty, seeing the reflections of a paris street through a puddle on the ground. i wish we could've stayed longer on that exhibit but alas, jeanne moreau told us to move.

*on another note, all the people working there were wearing chanel clothes made for the exhibit, and i asked one of them if they got to keep the jackets/sweaters. they said no, of course not. um, what the hell is chanel going to do with them? they can't give these poor guys a nylon jacket?

**"There they are again, the old familiar constellations that remind everyone of childhood, because it was only as a child that one gazed at them so raptly. They are everywhere. There you are, so remote from your childhood, and yet you meet it again. That's how small the world is.
And if you think some of it is foreign, you've mistaken. Everywhere is home. The Great Bear is a little nearer, that's all."- Joseph Roth from The White Cities, Reports from France 1925-39

Callas.

the look on her face before she starts to sing is heartbreaking. it's an emotion that says so much to me, it's everything all at once, love, peace, despair..and then when she sings.. everything is understood.

nice..

let's get lost..

unfinished..

last night i dreamt i forgot you
and friends became strangers you just spoke to
books were just words typed to impressed the paper
and songs became sounds lost into my ears.

i sat down next to you but i was really sitting alone.
you were like a story i heard a long time ago
i drew a picture in the air to place your features
time passes but the pain doesn't get any easier

and when it's lost cant it really be found
try to swim back to you and i start to drown
write a letter to you and the words come out all wrong
and the days that were short become so very long.

happy birthday..

Old School

on one of my last days in SF with my friend Meredith behind the camera. it was one of the funnest days of my life, doing all the touristey stuff i never did when i lived there..

before sunrise

Because it's things that we've all had on our minds. and because we can all imagine this probably happening. and because i kind of love julie delpy.

goodbye mr. newman..

Eternal Sunshine.

I always wanted to go here. I think its montauk. i love the way it looks. the colors. and the silence of it. My friend and i always joke that we should just skip work one day and just take the train there.

a bande aparte

I love this scene from Band of Outsiders. I really like the 'remake' of it in the Dreamers as well. I love Anna Karena in this movie. She's so beautiful and fresh. and Eva Green and Louis Garrel are super in the Dreamers..and it looks super fun to run through the louvre..

Un Homme et Une Fille

A simple yet complex love story. What i love best is the way it's filmed. it's so pretty, a beautiful washed out film and at times looks like a home movie (in a good way) and it has anouck aimee in it. wow.

Happy Together

Probably one of the most honest love stories i've ever seen. truthful, romantic and heartbreaking. Cinematography by christopher doyle really makes this movie even more beautiful. music tugs at your soul and just wonderful performances. 4:55 into this clip is one of my favorite scenes in movies. made me and my friend samson decide argentina is the place to be for chinese people.



bonus: this is where i want to live. in the movie millenium mambo. this movie seemed so real to me, but this town in japan.Yubari. where it looks so cold, but has a street with old movie posters. wow.

Isn't Life Strange?

Isn't life strange?
we walk in the dark
sarah and julie look up in the park
( fallin oooohhh)
jessica cries
she's got nothing to add
i sit beside her, but nobody's there
spin me round..
i'm fallin
spin me round..
i'm fallin

isn't life strange?
you end up alone
i call my folks,
but there's nobody home
spin me round..
i'm fallin
spin me round..
i'm fallin

8 1/2

This movie strangely resonated with me, as if part of it reflected my own fears and shortcomings.

Cinema Paradiso

I'll be posting my favorite clips from movies..
the first one is from Cinema Paradiso... a love affair not only with a woman, but the love of love. a more innocent time as well.
the ending montage really drives the story home.

some brief respite

in a world that i'm not quite familiar with but read about.

It's Pretty..

"Oh, Jake," Brett said, "we could have had such a damned good time together"

Ahead was a mounted policeman in khaki directing traffic. He raised his baton. The car slowly suddenly pressing Brett against me.

"Yes," I said. "Isn't it pretty to think so?"

-Ernest Hemingway.

Olympics

Well, the olympics are over. A few fancy suits from the opening ceremonies that i liked.

The Artist.

"An artist is always alone - if he is an artist. No, what the artist needs is loneliness."
-Henry Miller

I love this super tight family.

Regret..

"You're living in the good ol 'days right now, its just gonna take 20 years to figure that out." - Jay Adams

Buried Memories..

new drawings..

Travels with Charley...

"The guardian of the lake was a lonely man, the more so because he had a wife...She knew exactly what she wanted and he didn't, but his want would ache in him all his life. After he drove away in his jeep I lived his life in him and it put a mist of despair on me. He wanted his pretty little wife and he wanted something else and he couldn't have both." John Steinbeck.

life.

Man:Do you know Giacometti, the sculptor?
Woman: Oh, yes. He was hansome.
Man: Well, Giacometti once said: "If caught in a fire and I had to choose between a Rembrandt and a cat...I'd choose the cat.
Woman: "..and then I'd let it go."
Man: Did he say that too?
Woman: That's what's so wonderful.
Man: Yes, it is. Between art and life, he said he'd choose life.
Woman: Beautiful.
Man: Yes.

Prelude to a Kiss..

By photographer Tom Polumbo. Paris. 1962. The romance is all there. the nostalgia and the innocence. and most of all..the love.

Summer Mix Part 1

A Nice summer afternoon with some rain to take the heat off...

Caroline, No - Beach Boys
a song to play by the sunset.. of nostalgia, disappointment and love.

Visions of Tokyo- This is Oxford
just a fun song that has that beach feeling.

Homesick- Kings of Convenience
how i feel these days. you can picture yourself sitting by the windowsill looking out the window. are you sitting inside or locked out?

I lose some sales and my boss won't be happy
But I can't stop listening to the sound
Of two soft voices mended in perfection
From the reels of this record that I found
Everyday there's a boy in the mirror
Asking me what are you doing here
Finding all my previous motives
Growing increasingly unclear

I’ve travelled far and I’ve burned all the bridges
I believed as soon as I hit land
All the other options held before me
Will wither in the light of my plan
So I loose some sales and my boss won't be happy
But there’s only one thing on my mind
Searching boxes underneath the counter
On a chance that on a tape I’d find
A song for
Someone who needs somewhere
To long for

Homesick
Cause I no longer know
What home is

Postales- Federico Aubele
I saw them in concert with Thievery Corp. Awesome.

Cambodia- Kim Wilde
Very 80s feeling song. Was in a movie i just saw.. Dans Paris. in probably the best scene in the movie.

She Loves Everybody- Chester French
New band signed by Pharrell. Again, just fun, great sound.

Paper Planes- M.I.A

Photographs are not memories- Victor Bermon

The Look of Love- Sergio Mendes
Always a classic..

Light My Fire- Astrud Gilberto
A summer evening.. music, good company, candles and wine.

Changes- Seu Jorge
Also in concert with Thievery Corp when i saw them.. perfect for my rainy day. I think i like this version better than the Bowie original. Heartbreaking.

You and I- Dennis Wilson
Another California feeling sound. Recently reissued.

Summerlong- Paper Cuts

A Summer Song- Chad and Jeremy

Your Summer Dress- Dirty on Purpose

Sweet and Low Ponies in the Surf.

Terminus by Paul Fryer

"I sort of hanged myself that day
when I turned and walked away...
nobody every knows the pain we feel
especially at vain regret...
And so
I caught the next
and ended up
at the end of the line alone
crying as too tired I tried to write
my squeaky excuses on wet metal
with my empty indelible pen"

Thievery Corp+Perry Ferrell= Crazy Delicious

Revolution Solution

The Hollywood Bowl was originally a natural amphitheater. The first person to be employed to design a shell for the stage in order to help broadcast the sound was Lloyd Wright, son of Frank Lloyd Wright. In 1931 Lloyd Wright’s wooden shell was replaced with a concrete one designed by Allied Architects of Los Angeles. That shell was in turn replaced by one designed by Frank Gehry in 1982. The fifth and latest dome (2004) is the design of Hodgetts + Fung Design Associates.

I went tonight with my best pal samson to see Thievery Corporation. It was an unexpected surprise. I didn't come to LA for the happiest of occasions, but left with one of the best experiences of my life. The venue is such a beautiful place, being in the middle of all these trees, and the beautiful california sky, it feels so classically los angeles, which makes me want to live here again. there is a romance of la that i think has been lost, but more on that some other time. the music was so wonderful, bebe gilberto and thievery corporation.. and perry ferrell came out for what i believe was Revolution Solution. I can't think of a more awesome surprise.

People were dancing in the aisles, and i could totally picture you there too... dancing free, letting the beats overtake you. and i felt like you were there. you knew how much i loved to see you dance. and it made me smile.

there is a primal feeling to it. a few well placed beats and you can't help but nod your head. pictures to come.

Endless Summer..

This is how summer should feel like. the movie "endless summer" call me nostalgic... but when i walk out everyday, i don't feel summer. i feel like urban hell. :) maybe i should move back to california...

"a summer chill" - this is ivy league. that's my first song of summer.

i'm still reading (re reading) sun also rises.
"it is awfully easy to be hard-boiled about everything in the daytime, but at night it is another thing"
so terribly true. in one sentence, life is explained. at night, even if you're with someone, aren't we all just a bit lonely?

one i always loved..

If You Forget Me

I want you to know
one thing.

You know how this is:
if I look
at the crystal moon, at the red branch
of the slow autumn at my window,
if I touch
near the fire
the impalpable ash
or the wrinkled body of the log,
everything carries me to you,
as if everything that exists,
aromas, light, metals,
were little boats
that sail
toward those isles of yours that wait for me.

Well, now,
if little by little you stop loving me
I shall stop loving you little by little.

If suddenly
you forget me
do not look for me,
for I shall already have forgotten you.

If you think it long and mad,
the wind of banners
that passes through my life,
and you decide
to leave me at the shore
of the heart where I have roots,
remember
that on that day,
at that hour,
I shall lift my arms
and my roots will set off
to seek another land.

But
if each day,
each hour,
you feel that you are destined for me
with implacable sweetness,
if each day a flower
climbs up to your lips to seek me,
ah my love, ah my own,
in me all that fire is repeated,
in me nothing is extinguished or forgotten,
my love feeds on your love, beloved,
and as long as you live it will be in your arms
without leaving mine.

Pablo Neruda


i've had a sad day today. death is always difficult for me, and i i guess you know i take it hard in my own way. i wish you were around to speak to. you'd know the right words to say. i re read some of your old notes.. even words written in the past were good for some comfort. i always loved this poem by neruda. sometimes i fear that the 4th stanza rings true for you... i hope not. i tend to disagree with neruda as much as i love this one. love does not need to feed on love. sometimes it needs to nourishment. and it lasts forever.. and its roots will always remain.

freedom..

Was watching the z-boys movie again. remember how much we loved it duuuude? when i see it, i can see the freedom that you always talked about and loved. the youthful energy of how people just did what they wanted and created something new and great. it's funny how sometimes we don't see it until we're older..

addendum: the word you used to use was spontaneous. :)

The sun also rises..

i read this today. it reminded me you..

she was looking into my eyes with that way she had of looking that made you wonder whether she really saw out of her own eyes. they would look on and on after everyone else's eyes in the world would have stopped looking. she looked as though there were nothing on earth she would not look at like that, and really she was afraid of so many things.

-hemingway "the sun also rises"

the past..

I saw someone today as i walked out of the subway station. it was a glance, and looked again, and i saw someone we knew from the past. And he looked the same. with another friend of his. And i looked at him, and there was no emotion from me. There was a time that I would even despise thinking of him, but now, just nothing.

I think of whether not you see him or not, and how you didn't like him either, but he may still be in your life somehow.

The weather is cool tonight. People are out, buzzing with excitement for the weekend. It's supposed to be very warm. I'm moving through time without leaving one place.

summer

today summer really begins.. unofficially of course. it was dead hot here in new york city. hot. sticky. uncomfortable. you can almost smell the garbage beginning to rot on the streets. you didn't just breathe the air, you felt it, like a sticky web all around you.

this isn't summer. the picture above is how i'd like to imagine summer. breezy. beautiful. like a long weekend between a busy work week.

words we said in a letter.

make a noise in the dark so i know you're there
lost on location but the view is still the same
people move in and out with a little less care
everyone looking like you none with your name

can a liar ever tell the truth
and will my words ever make it through
they're just waiting on your doorstep
memories passing through but always kept

last time i sat here another band was playing
right now was still a tomorrow yet unseen
spring was more like winter and fall more like spring
and the view from my seat is just less interesting.

this was my time please can you please see
now we're locked doors searching for our keys..

fancygreysuit.com

i'll be updating this periodically now with a new project i have been thinking about..

koons

I went to the igoogle launch party today. i created some of the artwork for the oscar de la renta portion of it. and jeff koons was there and i met him. and he was the nicest person. completely humble and so sweet. it was quite moving. and i'm still so excited. and i thought that you would be excited too. and i wish i could tell you all about it.

walden

today i watched walden by Jonas Mekas. the way it was shot, like watching a home video, really made you feel like you were experiencing his life with him. There was this part, where he talks about the world moving quickly and you can just watch this movie. and it stops. how you can interact and get something from these moving images, or you can just tune out, really got me thinking. It was like he was talking about how we're not stopping long enough to get something out of things. We move too quickly and time is lost and when you turn around, you missed it.

she's better now..

the best thing ever..

i saw this on another blog and had to share it. it's the best thing ever. and i'm sure you'd like it.

How are you? Do you remember? This day we met on this bench? One year or more... Since you left to Switzerland I lost my dad and my best uncle. I lost my dreams about life and love. Sometimes losing my mind... Never forgetting you. I wish you the best!!! From here to nowhere.

Parc du Cinquantenaire, Brussels, Belgium

like you..

When i read this, it reminded me of you. about how fragile you could be, in a precious way. about how special you are. that there were other forces at work. that beneath that hard exterior, you just wanted to be loved like everyone else..


I didn't want my picture taken because I was going to cry. I didn't know why I was going to cry, but I knew that if anybody spoke to me or looked at me too closely the tears would fly out of my eyes and the sobs would fly out of my throat and I'd cry for a week. I could feel the tears brimming and sloshing in me like water in a glass that is unsteady and too full. ~Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar,

Time and again.

i hate sunday nights.

Today.

"let's start over again.."

Glow.

Last night I dreamed I saw you again. I went to a small clothing store. It could've been on Lafayette. You saw me and you looked surprised and like you didn't want to see me. Then you gave me a smirk. You know that smirk/smile you do, when you know something that i don't. the one that's so frustrating yet mischevious and endearing at the same time. And you looked so young. so fresh as if you were glowing. And today i couldn't stop thinking about it. And hoped that you glowing in real life.

Excerpt from "I don't owe you anything" by the Smiths (i'm listening to the Sandy Shaw version)

Did I really walk all this way
Just to hear you say :
"Oh, I don't want to go out tonight" ?
"Oh, I don't want to go out tonight"

But you will
For you must


I don't owe you anything, no
But you owe me something
Repay me now


Too freely on your lips
Words prematurely sad
Oh, but I know what will make you smile tonight


Life is never kind
Life is never kind
Oh, but I know what will make you smile tonight

My Blueberry Nights

I saw My Blueberry Nights today. Let me preempt this with the fact that I am a huge WKW fan. I went into this movie with very low expectations since this movie got relatively panned by critics. It wasn't bad. at all. WKW needs to stop going into his bag of tricks with the same visual effects.. slow motion, stop motion etc. The art direction was so-so as well. William Chang should've stayed away from the usual 'moody' look of the other films as I think he failed to capture the heart of the cities that the movies took place in. Norah Jones' acting left a bit to be desired, but I think this came from the lack of depth her character had.

On to the good. Jude Law was great. His character was fresh and his interaction with Chan Marshall was my favorite part of the movie.

Katya: Sometimes, even if you have the keys those doors still can't be opened. Can they?

Jeremy: Even if the door is open, the person you're looking for may not be there, Katya.